Novelist Esther Freud has revealed the real reason behind the shock collapse of her 27 year relationship with Sherwood star David Morrissey.
The daughter of the late artist Lucian Freud, who was wed to the actor, 61, for 13 years until 2019, has admitted that despite trying ‘absolutely everything’ to save it, the menopause and her overwhelming desire for children put intense strain on their marriage.
‘I don’t think what I was going through at that point even occurred to me as menopause related,’ said Esther, 62. ‘But what I found was things that I had been able to manage suddenly became unbearable’.
‘I couldn’t sleep, and the thoughts and worries and frustrations just went round. It was a very painful period, and led, ultimately, to the end of my marriage.’
The couple, who met at drama school, married in a ceremony on Southwold Pier after dating for over a decade. They have three children together: Albie, Anna and Gene.
Following their split David moved on with theatrical agent Larah Simpson, 32 – who is just four years older than his eldest son.
Novelist Esther Freud, 62, has revealed the real reason behind the shock collapse of her 27-year relationship with Sherwood star David Morrissey, 61
She was was married to the actor for 13 years until their split in 2019, and admitted that the menopause and her desire for children put strain on their marriage (pictured 2006)
Following their split David moved on with theatrical agent Larah Simpson, 32, (pictured together 2024) who is just four years older than his eldest son
Esther, the great-granddaughter of Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis, has now revealed the extent to which her menopausal symptoms contributed to the end of her relationship.
Speaking on the Postcards From Midlife podcast, she explained: ‘It’s not that things were so much worse than they had been at different times, but somehow, suddenly, it was impossible for me to bear,’ she said. ‘I tried absolutely everything to keep my marriage together.’
She added that her desire to keep the family intact was rooted in her own upbringing, which saw her parents split before she was born. Esther is one of Lucian Freud’s 14 children. Her mother was the writer and gardener Bernardine Coverley.
‘I wanted to do things differently. I wanted a stable environment for my children. I had a sort of romantic idea, which I have to say I still do, of coming through.’
Esther admitted she had pre-grieved the relationship long before David finally moved out of their London home.
‘I did lots of things to distract myself around that time,’ she said. ‘I started having singing lessons, piano lessons, and weirdly and unusefully, German conversation classes. Anything that was available.
‘I felt so devastated by the breakdown of the relationship. I was having a piano lesson the day he moved out… I didn’t even mention it even though I was quite good friends with the piano teacher.’
Esther also revealed how her deep longing for children shaped – and in some ways unbalanced – the dynamic of her marriage.
The couple married in a ceremony on Southwold Pier after dating for over a decade. They have three children together: Albie, Anna and Gene (David pictured in Sherwood)
She added that her desire to keep the family intact was rooted in her own upbringing, which saw her parents split before she was born (pictured together 2014)
Esther’s father the Lucian Freud pictured with her fashion designer sister Bella in 2008
‘I was very, very driven by the desire and the need to have children. So my relationships were quite overshadowed by the fact that I needed something. I needed permission to do something I desperately needed to do, and there was a power imbalance in that.’
She added: ‘It wasn’t that I just needed one child. I needed three. And I’d known that since I was about three. I’ve always known it. When I got that third one, I was so happy.
‘A completely different self came out [after the divorce]. It is really interesting how different it is. I wish I could have always been that person, but I was extraordinarily broody, and I don’t think you can do anything about that.’
David previously highlighted the great differences in pair’s backgrounds. While he is the son of a Liverpudlian cobbler and a mother who worked for Littlewoods, Esther’s bohemian childhood formed the basis of her acclaimed novel Hideous Kinky, which was turned into a 1998 film starring Kate Winslet.
She is now in a relationship with Gerry Simpson, 62, a professor of law at LSE.
‘There was nothing I needed from him,’ she said of her new partner. ‘All I needed from him was that it was interesting, and that it was fun, and that he was someone I could really speak to… I wasn’t trying to be a very capable person, or someone who wouldn’t mind if they went away for nine months. It’s just like a completely different self.’
Another source of healing has been her daily ritual of outdoor swimming, which she credits with curing her codependency. ‘I decided to swim every Sunday and Wednesday for a whole year. Whether it was snowing, whether we had to break the ice, whatever. I had been a really codependent person… Suddenly, I just did it. I would say it almost cured me.’
Though the end of the marriage to David was painful, Esther insists it was the right decision for both of them. ‘He’s happier now. We get on really well. Kids seem fine. I’m happier for sure. And it took courage. I really admire people who have the courage to leave a relationship that isn’t working if they’ve tried everything they can try.’
And as for lasting love, she remains a believer. ‘I’ll never give up. I love romance. As far as I’m concerned, if you can find the one, find the one… Maybe there are more than one. Our lives are long.’
Following their split in 2019 a source told MailOnline: ‘It’s a great shame, but they just couldn’t make it work any longer, They are making sure that the interests of their three children come first.’
